Understanding comes slowly.
Unyielding pain and suffocating breathlessness are the messengers.
They give a glimpse, a taste of some who have gone before.
How it is to be under constant siege.
Relentless.
Never Ending.
Until everything ends.
How it is to hold perverse jealousy for those who have made their escape.
How it is to wish it were me instead of them, and to know that is pure selfishness.
How it is to have only a distant memory of life without pain.
How it is to realize it was all taken for granted.
How it is to wish for a way, an avenue, an exit.
From pain.
From hopelesness.
Vic and Bett, I miss you.
And I'm beginning to understand you.
Please forgive me, I never knew.
So Many Social Networks, So Little Time!
About Me
- Jeannie
- I'm a middle aged lady in a funky place in life, but I guess that's what middle age is all about. I always thought middle age "crises" were carefree "flings", but my middle age crisis has been more of an exercise in character building and just plain old hard knocks. The thoughts of "fun" and "fling" have rarely crossed the threshold of my foggy brain since my world turned upside down in 2003.
Uh-oh, Now I'm in TROUBLE!
1 comments:
None of the pain is lost, Darling girl. You just made solid connection. It is NOT hope-less. Do your very best to transcend it for a moment--a few seconds, even. Measure it against the Gifts of sight and hearing Amanda's voice. and, as Saint Teresa said,
"Lutt Godtt".
Post a Comment